amorettea: (Default)
[personal profile] amorettea
I have been feeling the Black Slog creeping up on me all summer. I keep having this strange tight feeling in chest that makes me cough. Before I gave it up to stress, I thought I'd go the physical route.
One chest x-ray and one CAT scan and one ultrasound and one needle aspiration and $4000 later, I know I don't have lung cancer or thyroid cancer but the tightness in my chest is worse and I want to crawl into bed and never get out.
Combined with what I call my paranoid hypochondria--my obsession with whatever diseases are going around and they are, including a nasty cold, a really nasty barfing bug and what looks like a long, sick winter, I decided maybe I should see a therapist.
Then the election returns came in.
I start seeing her on Tuesday. I hope she can help because my chest is constantly tight and while I don't think about actively killing myself, not waking up one morning is appealing.
I am forcing myself to have two Christmas parties this year. May not help with the stress (cough cough) but may force me to function.
And we are due for single digit cold starting Monday.
Aren't I a bowl full of cheery.
Sigh.
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amorettea

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